The Thing about Love
The heart is the most powerful organ in the physical body. But having heart as an emotion, can be a plethora of varying degrees.
Physically it keeps in motion throughout a lifetime for many of us. It keeps the blood flowing throughout the body providing the oxygen to sustain life. Overall, as an organ, there is no competition.
The heart as an emotion can be defined, based on the word used with it. For example, “I love them like a (friend, daughter, niece, son, nephew, uncle, aunt, dad, mom, brother, sister, wife, and husband). The emotion attached to these descriptions is what defines the relationship and based on the degree of affection and faith, is what makes it strong or fragile.
Many of us, look at love as the reference to spending the rest of our lives with a person. Based on this love for a lifetime we expend a considerable amount of our lives pursuing this quest. Dating is an industry with apps, events and even conventions to accommodate the emotion of having heart or love for someone.
Experiencing this emotion in the new light of dating again after forty plus years of marriage and being a widow the last nine years, there seems to be new ground rules. I have found these out the hard way through hurt emotions of the heart. I did not know what ghosting was, as well as the proper way to interact with the opposite sex. I didn’t get the memo that got lost somewhere along the way.
Today I am cautious in what I say or do so that I won’t offend or encourage someone to do the opposite of what they would define as normal. I let the woman in my case ask me for my number. Or if I like someone, I give them my number and don’t take theirs. This gives them the power to decide whether to move forward and call me or just delete my number when they get to their ride. In either case the choice is theirs and not mine. In most situations I cause enough curiosity and mystery about me to get them to make the call. For me it is good either way. Life is too short to worry about the small stuff. It is much better to live life to the fullest and love everyone equally. Leaving no one behind for wanting love.
I have many loves that are friends, siblings, and relatives. Each one of varying degrees based on the personal relationship and affection I have with each of them. Alas so far, I have only had that one love in my life, and we were fortunate to have that love for a lifetime before she passed. I now only seek the relationship of a good friend and content that I had already found my one true love. My true love now comes through the relationship of one good friend. One does not need more than a handful of friends to enjoy life and share the memories with a good friend. You validate each other as a witness to each other’s life lived.
Searching for a new friend, that love can grow into a love of a lifetime, one should always be happy to be a friend loved. I wish you luck as I continue my quest to find two more true friends to love. Beyond that I will let fate and the other person let me know that my status has changed from friendly love to amorous lover. If that never happens, I will still be content with the friendship offered.
Thank you for reading and aloha.
Ismael Fernandez Jr.
